I never saw a jar of applesauce that had a plastic spoon inside, and that made me angry. I thought, "there is no reason not to include a plastic spoon in a jar of applesauce". One day, waiting for the doors, I thought: where is this spoon I've heard so much about?
Well, I found it. It was in the applesauce, but the applesauce wasn't where you expected it. It had been put there by a couple from out of town, who for some reason believed that it would be easier and slightly rebellious to spend their honeymoon traveling in the guise of salespeople from out of town, not on a honeymoon at all, but selling things. Not exactly poetic, huh? But they're not poets. Idiots, more like. Them and their applesauce. So anyway, I choose to ignore the obvious lack of a spoon and buy the stuff anyway, assuming in the worst case that you could simply drink from the jar. Of course, that would leave sticky around your mouth, but that's ok, because who's not sticky around their mouth at one time or another? I walk out and the glare of the sun hurts my eyes and the heat is very uncomfortable. I start to be befuddled and think of The Stranger. Looking around, I see no Arabs, and therefore my life will not be cut short abruptly by a Frenchman wearing a hood. Of course, this is assuming that it would have, had I.